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Beat The Kids

Dr G, Radio 4’s resident parentologist, also known as Graeme Garden, welcomes you to “Beat the Kids”, a panel show in which parents and their children undertake a number of tasks to try and prove that they are not as strict, embarrassing, and naive of youth culture as their children believe. They very rarely manage it.

When I say parents, I of course mean two comedians of the highest calibre. And when I say their children... well, you get the picture. Interesting combinations include Gina Yashere as the sister of Dara O’Briain and the daughter of Lucy Porter and Steve Frost, and Tim Brooke-Taylor as the mother of Sandi Toksvig. Only on the radio.

This is one of the most original and innovative comedy shows Radio 4 has ever had the foresight to commission. It consists almost entirely of improvisation, and the brilliant panellists always come up trumps with excellent banter, somehow never slipping out of character. Rounds such as “The Worst Thing You Ever Did” provide the teenagers the chance to get their own back on their parents by demanding closure for embarrassing events precipitated by their parents during their childhood, whether it be running the three-legged race naked on school sports day, or breast-feeding someone else’s baby in the front row of the school nativity play. Dr G attempts to smooth the culture clash between parents and children with “My Favourite Song”, a round in which the parents have to find three positive things to say about their child’s favourite song and vice versa. Dr G is very liberal in what he terms as “positive”, however, with things like “it’s good to play at a funeral” and “it’s finished” both getting points.

It seems that this sort of show can only produce the high standard of comedy if the panellists continue to be as clever and quick as, for example, Marcus Brigstocke and Hugh Dennis in the first episode. So far, they have kept up this standard, and I’ve a feeling in my bones that it may well continue.

So, if your teenage children aren’t playing hip-hop too loudly, or if your parents aren’t embarrassing you by shagging so hard in the next room they’re making the bed pound against the wall, settle down to listen to Beat the Kids.

Beat the Kids is on Radio 4, Wednesdays, 11pm.

Review by Nat, Queen of the Air Waves

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